*Drafting Guys Over 60*

  • March 8, 2012 3:23 PM PST
    >
    > *This is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier... *
    >
    > *New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!*

    > *I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to
    > track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to
    > join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards.
    > Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take
    > us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit
    > until you're at least 35. *
    >
    > *For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about
    > sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about
    > sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000
    > additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.*
    >
    > *Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a
    > cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't
    > sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe
    > letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it
    > will make us feel better and shut us up for awhile.. *
    >
    > *An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am . Old guys
    > always get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I
    > said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may
    > as well be up killing some** fanatical son-of-a-bitch. *
    >
    > *If captured we couldn't spill the** beans because we'd forget where
    > we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number
    > would be a real brainteaser.*
    >
    > *Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting
    > screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also
    > developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them
    > for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the
    > screaming and yelling. *
    >
    > *They could lighten up on the obstacle course however... I've
    > been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope
    > hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after
    > completing basic training. *
    >
    > *Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too... I've
    > never seen anyone outrun a bullet. *
    >
    > *An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still
    > learning to shave, to start a conversation with a pretty girl.
    > He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to
    > shade his eyes, not the back of his head.*
    >
    > *These are all great reasons to keep** our kids at home to learn a little
    > more about life before sending them off into harm's way. *
    >
    > *Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The
    > last thing an enemy would want to** see is a couple million pissed off
    > old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons, who know
    > that their best years are already behind them. *
    >
    > *HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!!
    > You think MEN have attitudes??*
    >
    > *Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on
    > border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night!** *
    >
  • March 8, 2012 8:12 PM PST
    EXCELLENT!!!!!
    • 1780 posts
    March 8, 2012 10:50 PM PST
    I'm in!!!
    • 2 posts
    March 8, 2012 11:46 PM PST

    51 year old woman graduates from Army boot camp

    Army Sgt. Sandra Coast graduated from U.S. Army Basic Combat Training at the age of 51, finishing training with one of the highest physical fitness test scores in her company after having to lose 30 pounds just to qualify for basic training.

    "I was impressed, because she can do everything the younger soldiers do," Army 1st Sgt. John Byars said of Coast, according to the Armed Forced Press Service (AFPS). "She never expected us to feel sorry for her. She even got one of the highest Army physical fitness test scores in the company. She is a prime example that age is just a number. She ran faster than soldiers young enough to be her kids."

    http://campaign2012.washingtonexaminer.com/blogs/beltway-confidential/51-year-old-woman-graduates-army-boot-camp/386486 

     

    • 80 posts
    March 9, 2012 2:11 AM PST
    Works for me
  • March 9, 2012 2:18 AM PST
    Age and Wisdom beats them pesky kids every time.....I just tell the kids to never mess with us old farts...we been there, done that, and wore the scars of life long before they was even a twinkle in an eye...lol...
    • 846 posts
    March 9, 2012 2:29 AM PST
    As I tell some of the younger guys don't piss me off I have a lot less to loose. I like the idea and include politicians to it would cut down on the number of wars.
    • 3006 posts
    March 10, 2012 3:32 PM PST
    Good Post !!!
  • March 11, 2012 9:37 AM PDT
    Not to mention the Army APFT Standards are a lot lower the older you are, so if she's in good shape that test would be a joke:-)
  • March 11, 2012 9:50 AM PDT
    Gimme a gun.....
    • 58 posts
    March 11, 2012 11:21 AM PDT
    Roflmfao

    Black9: remember that many of the service schools, and I think basic is one, use only the 18 year old pft standards. Even at 35 when I was doing air assault, I had to pass the 18 year old pft.
  • March 14, 2012 3:09 AM PDT
    Its funny. Did my time in the army. I ve often wonder the vary same shit. As a young man I was much easyer to get to mellow out. Now I get pissed off. It last for days!!!!!
  • March 14, 2012 3:35 AM PDT
    LOL! Woman in menopause is a dangerous weapon even with out a weapon, ya never know when they're going to go off. Heck the enemy would be killing themselves just to get away from "the old gals"........LOL!
  • March 14, 2012 4:39 AM PDT
    I don't know how many retiree's we have on this site, but folks....I've got some news for you; they own us until age 70. Yep...if need be you can be recalled in some capacity up to age 70. I retired at age 48, was called back 4 years later for 2 more years.....I'm now in hiding......changed my phone number...
    • 2072 posts
    March 14, 2012 11:38 AM PDT
    I've got an Uncle that gave 25 years to the Army. I asked him one day if he could have a "do over" would he do it again. He said "Hell yes, I'd go back in right now if they would let me !!!! And that old fart is 80 years old and going strong !!!!
    • 9 posts
    March 14, 2012 12:08 PM PDT
    Suicide by Matron. Sounds do-able. You ain't met cranky til you piss Momma off in the mornin'!!! And I'm all for replacing the "kids" we send to war, with guys over 38. Hell, I got an ex, that would be PERFECT! I mean, I hate war and all, and I would hate to lose any of my good friends that way, but you guys have gotten to live your lives (for the most part), and I think more maturity would benefit all involved. Have you seen the statistics, on suicide rates, for returning soldiers? These kids aren't prepared for what they're seeing. Hell, most grown-assed men, have a tough time with it. But better suited for it? Definitely.

    Ride Free
    Tweek
    • 58 posts
    March 14, 2012 12:47 PM PDT
    Yea, what mac117 said. Because of my MOS, I was expecting an official summons for a long time. Was almost disappointed even that it never came.
    • 1855 posts
    March 14, 2012 2:51 PM PDT
    mac117 wrote...
    I don't know how many retiree's we have on this site, but folks....I've got some news for you; they own us until age 70. Yep...if need be you can be recalled in some capacity up to age 70. I retired at age 48, was called back 4 years later for 2 more years.....I'm now in hiding......changed my phone number...


    Plus 1 on that!!!!!!!!!!    I was a medic in Nam.  And ya know, war is a helluva lot more than just testosterone.  As far as I'm concerned, having been there and done that ain't something I want to do again.  At my age, testosterone is better served between the sheets.  Yes. If they get that desparate, I'll go.  But there's no freakin' glory in it.  God bless our troops and keep 'em safe from harm.

    Peace
    • 1161 posts
    March 14, 2012 3:17 PM PDT
    Ok as a young buck (35) I was expecting a recall letter when 9-11 because I was only out just over a year. And with my MOS and training experience I was expecting to be recalled to help train new recruits. But I don't think I would be much good to them now after my accident. But would not trade it for anything and would still do it all over again.
    • 1855 posts
    March 14, 2012 3:43 PM PDT
    I spent a year in the jungle. I still had over a year to do in the Army when I went home. Had they called me back for another tour I just can't imagine how much more fkd up I would have become. The night terrors are gone now. The flashbacks have dissipated. But the memories of the horror of war have never vanished. I still sit facing the door. I still look over my shoulder. I still imagine the worst of any scenario I'm in. Some may say that's just being prepared. All I can say is God have mercy on the brave.